It’s official. I put in my letter of resignation. When the 2011-2012 school year rolls around, I won’t be returning to the classroom.
Crazy, right?
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I mean, “Don’t quit your day job!” is probably the most commonly dispensed piece of advice given to newly contracted authors.
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So what am I thinking? Why am I doing the very thing professionals advise not to do?
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Because.
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My son can put on his shoes.
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How did this happen?
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Just yesterday, he was this:
And now, he’s this:
How did he go from being this tiny, helpless baby to this little person who tears down the steps and sings the ABC’s? Time is traveling at this ever-increasing speed and I’m completely freaked out that one day, I’m going to blink and all of a sudden he’ll be packing for college.
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For the past two and a half years, I’ve been a wife, and a mother, and a teacher, and a writer. And I’ve done an okay job. But when it comes to my family and writing – I don’t want to just do okay. I don’t want to wake up when I’m sixty and regret the decisions I’m making now.
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So after a lot (and I mean A LOT) of praying, and a lot of budgeting, and a lot of counsel (some of which came from my amazing, amazing agent), Ryan and I decided we’re going to do it. I’m going to stay home next year. It’s a giant step of faith. But it’s the best decision for our family right now.
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So how do you know when it’s okay to set aside the, “Don’t quit your day job!” advice? That’s going to be different for everyone, but here’s why I’m confident I’m doing the right thing:
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We didn’t make the decision based on my writing income.
We did not factor in ANY of my writing income when making this decision. Because writing income is incredibly unpredictable and often nonexistent. Any money I make through writing will be a bonus.
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We gave it a test drive before making the decision.
For the past few months, ever since Ryan and I felt God laying this on our hearts, we’ve dumped my paycheck into our savings and lived strictly off his income. I’m not going to lie. It’s been tight. We’ve had to make sacrifices and change the way we do things. But we can make it work and the sacrifices are worth it.
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We’ve thought about ways I could supplement our income.
I’m in a great position to tutor and if money gets super tight, I can always sub here and there.
But the biggest factor was this…..
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We both felt God calling us in this direction and we needed to obey.
I’ve felt the tug to stay home ever since Brogan was born. But I always ignored it because I was afraid of losing the safety and the security that comes with my paycheck. I said I trusted God, but I wasn’t acting as if I trusted Him.
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I’m reading this amazing book right now called Experiencing God. There’s this part where the author talks about the difference between knowing something about God, and experiencing something about God. I know God as my provider. But I’ve never let myself experience God as my provider. It’s time for me to let go of my fear and trust that where He leads, His provision will follow.
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Let’s Talk: Have you ever had to make a BIG decision? How did you do it?
I admire you as well! We did this when I felt God calling me into the ministry with the bookstore and it was amazing how much He blessed us financially after we did. Scary yes, but wondeful. You will not regret it!
I admire you, Katie, and I think you're making the right decision, hands down. Best to you!
Hey Katie,
WOW, I just saw this! Congrats!!! I know this has been something you've really, really wanted and to be honest, I think you're doing the right thing.
I always tell people that if they can stay home, do it. There's only about five years of cute toddlerdom. It will never come back so you gotta catch what you can. 🙂 You might find it challenging in different ways, but you won't regret it!
CONGRATS!
What an amazing leap of faith you're taking, Katie! Good for you. I know that you won't regret it.
Congrats Katie! I quit working when my son turned 3.5 and everyone said, "What, wait, why now?" And it was because he was getting so independent. It was a wake up call for me that I wanted to be home. I bet you'll love it.
Good for you! It will be so worth it! Life has been full of big decisions, and though not easy ones, we always tend to lean toward what gives us most peace and excitement! And try to let God take all the fear. Every time we moved into a bigger home with our growing family, it was a step of faith. Not easy and there's been time's of really tight budgeting, but we've always made it through. So will you!
Good luck with this decision! As a teacher myself, I know the sacrifice you're making. If my novel sold tomorrow, I might do the same. If you need any tutoring advice, please let me know; my email is available on my blog or website. I've been teaching and tutoring and coaching and writing for 11 years now; I made 17K one year, just tutoring. But I've also been wondering, working so much, how many pages I haven't typed, how many novels and short stories I haven't written. Though I don't yet have a family, I understand the pull you felt and the decision you made. Good luck!
So sorry I missed this post until now! Congratulations! This is an amazing step of faith and a wonderful new adventure for your family. I love being a stay-at-home mom and even though it's tight, it's so worth it and just right for our family right now.
I haven't read the comments, but I'm assuming most/all of them say, "You won't regret this!" I quit teaching when my oldest was born 10 years ago, and it's been INCREDIBLE. Then my hubby quit his job too. 🙂 (long story) Oh my word, things have been SO tight at times, but God is so good, and I wouldn't trade it for the world. Hugs to you!
Wow…Katie, I'm so happy for you. It's so hard to make that decision. We did the exact same thing two years ago. As I finished a school year my baby was 26 months old and we decided that was the right thing for us. We calculated that we could continue to meet all our needs and wants if I could watch two other kids. That's what we expected right away, but it isn't quite what happened. It's a very long story, and it's still a work in process…my "baby" is four now and our other baby is 10 months! The bottom line, though, is that things do get tight and God does know exactly what we are capable of and what we need. It is amazing to feel his hand in our lives.
Enjoy this time of your lives!
Carla
When I got pregnant with our first child, my husband and I decided that I would stay home. So I quit teaching as well – and I couldn't be happier with the decision. I see now how stressful teaching was. And I love watching our kids grow up and the relationship that we have because I stay home. There's nothing better than playing with them and teaching them and being with them.
And yes, you have to maintain a tight budget. We certainly do. But that's just part of it, and like you said, it's worth the sacrifice. The Lord provides.
http://laurenspathtopub.blogspot.com/
Hi Katie –
I've never been in your position, but the Lord spoke to my heart about quitting a good job and going back to Bible School. It was one of the hardest decisions I've ever made.
Sometimes we have to let go of the good to receive God's best. 🙂
Blessings,
Susan
You will never, ever, regret spending time with your children. And, yes, you have subbing and tutoring, and hopefully writing income. Best wishes to you!
I did it, Katie. My kids were 2 and newborn, AND I was working FT. Needless to say, I was nearly insane by year's end. I too resigned my teaching job.
Like you, I had to supplement our income at that time. I watched my friend's daughter. I enjoyed the year, but found that I sincerely missed teaching. Even so, I wouldn't have gone back if a part time teaching job hadn't opened up the next year. So when I returned, my children were 4 and 2 and I only worked three days a week on a teacher's schedule. That means I was with my children a lot more than I was without them.
I know this: you will never regret the years you spend at home with your children. Take it from a mom of a 14 and 11 yr. old: you can never get these years back.
God bless you.
Katie, I'm so late commenting because I had to be at school until 9 last night, but I wanted to jump in and applaud your decision (and your decision-making process) and wish you the best.
I know this is hard, but it's going to be wonderful!
I stayed home when my children were young and it was one of the best decisions I ever made. Sure things were tight financially, and sue we had to forgo some material goods, but I'll never regret the time I had with my girls when they were little.
If you check in, I'd love to know an author name for the book you mentioned. I googled it but wasn't sure I had the right book.
Katie, I am so excited about this decision. Experiencing God is such a blessing and there is nothing like it. So often we talk about it, but never take the step needed to really know Him intimately.
I know you will LOVE being home! Happy mothering and Happy writing! 🙂
Wow! Congratulations on taking such a big step. But it very much sounds like the right decision. It's wonderful that you had so much support as you made the decision and as you move forward with it. You're going to do great!
I could have written this post, every single word. The only difference is I left the classroom before selling my book, before even signing with my agent. When I think of it now, it's crazy, but you know what? It worked.
Like you said, I didn't want to be okay at family, writing, and teaching. I wanted to be able to do my best, and if I couldn't, as much as I loved the classroom, something had to change.
Good for you for doing what is right for you, not what common wisdom dictates you should do. Enjoy those precious moments with your little guy and live the dream!
And when you feel like discussing The Phantom Tollbooth come fall, you know where to find me. 😉
Congratulations on your decision. That, I find, is the toughest part, but once made you can move forward in your new journey, knowing you made the decision from a peaceful and knowing place directed by your dedication to God. Woohooo!
Staying home for your kids–love that!! I did it with my first two and was job-hunting when we found out our surprise baby was coming.
Financially we couldn't afford for me not to work, but we wanted the kids to be raised by us. So I stayed home. And we've never regretted it.
I bet you'll have a ball with your little guy! It's exhausting at times, but so, so rewarding.
Girl, I want to give you a big hug right now!! You'll be fine because you both went about it the right way, trusting God and asking HIm to show you how to make this work. I strongly support SAHM's and it breaks my heart that in this current economy, so many mom's who LONG to stay home with their kids, just can't. I've seen friends struggle with this, the kids suffer, they suffer, it's just not fun. You definitely will not regret this decision. And maybe we'll even get to chat more – woo hoo!!
Congratulations Katie! I'm so happy for you. I love that you and your husband are walking hand in hand on this writing journey. It couldn't work any other way.
I'm praying that God bless you richly for reaching for all He is calling you to!
Yes, Katie!!! I'm sooo excited for you!
I made the same difficult decision last fall. I felt like I'd missed out on so much of my son's first two years that after my daughter was born, it was a no-brainer for me. I'll admit there are days I wish I could sneak away to that day job though, LOL, especially when I wake up to a wet bed and spilled milk. But the investment I'm making is totally worth it.
Welcome to the wild side, my friend! 🙂
Good for you! It sounds like you've made the decision to quit your day job for very good reasons. I too am day-job-less so I can stay home with my kids. I don't miss working AT ALL, even when it means money is tighter than it would be if I worked. I love being home with my kids. I hope it is wonderful for you too.
HUGE congrats, Katie!! I've been there with the mommy/teacher/writer thing and it's so, so hard! I'm glad you'll be able to drop one of those roles to really focus on the others. AND, just FYI, when I quit my job as a teacher (almost five (!) years ago now) I was panicked…we did NOT have the income to pay our mortgage without me making money on the side… but God really has provided for us. And, I've found that I can make a LOT more money doing freelance articles, small web jobs than I did as a teacher. So, if push comes to shove and you're in a tight spot, writing a few articles or contributing to a devotional or writing a short story can help you earn some extra cash…and, to top that all off, I know your book is going to be a HUGE success! Let me know if you want me to send you some ideas for freelance positions/magazines that hire/web jobs for writers, etc.
I'm soooo happy for you! I know you've wanted this for a long time, and you're taking the plunge! Don't worry–God will provide.
It's amazing how many things I didn't miss when I quit my job years ago. I'm not going to lie–I'd love to have the funds to go to conferences and to go on vacations, but we've been so blessed. Sometimes not having money for all of our wishes is God's way of asking us to trust Him. I'll never regret taking years off to raise my kids.
Congratulations!!
Your struggle touched me, truthfully got me misty. Raising kids goes by so fast, no matter how it's done. I am very grateful to have been able to stay home with my kids full time for many years. My daughter must work and it's hard for her to be away from the kids so much. Everyone has an opinion on this topic, but it is such an individual matter. You have put in the prayer and you got your answer. You will be in my prayers in the coming months as you work to implement this new lifestyle and writing schedule. It's exciting to think of what God has for you in the way of growing and maturing in your writing. (I sense something special in the works.)
What an amazing thing for you to be able to do. My husband and I got married really young (I was eighteen, he was twenty) and my kids were born when I was also very young (I was nineteen and twenty-one, respectively), and we had decided very early on that I would stay home with them. I had always wanted to, and we knew it would mean a lot of sacrifice, but God is faithful and has always provided. My kids are eight and six now, and I homeschool them, and I'm so thankful to be able to stay with them. I'm sure it will be such a blessing for all of you!
I would love to stay at home and right now we are struggling with the same decision. I think turning to prayer is the best thing you can do to make a decision like this.
I'm sure you'll love your time at home.
Big decisions for me come through much prayer and waiting patiently for direction. You won't regret the step of faith. Stretching is good! 🙂
I did the Experiencing God bible study. It was incredible. Don't ya think?
Congrats, Katie! It's true, kids grow up fast. I have a daughter who will be 16 this year. Just prepare yourself–at first it's great to stay at home, but then (at least I) find myself longing to get out and do something else, even though I love being w/ my children. Sadly, life is never perfect–but you should have a little more time to write (at least during naps). 🙂
Oh, you'll never regret *experiencing* God. There's something so amazing that happens when you let go and let Him lead the way. Even if you're afraid while doing so, and even if it seems you're in over your head, God will have infinite patience with you, and will guide you along the right path.
Congrats on taking this step. Time with your little guy is totally worth the risk.
Barb
So proud of you, Katie. I know how long this desire has been on your heart! I so look forward to hearing how the next year will stretch you, shape you, and bless you. Way to follow your heart and God's lead…
xoxoxo,
H
Katie, I admire you and your husband for making this decision, one that couldn't have been easy. May you experience peace and joy as you move forward in faith.
I feel so old when I say this, but children grow up sooo fast. They do head off to college before you know it, and you find yourself looking back and wondering where the years went. I'm glad you'll have more time each day with your adorable little guy. Store up those precious memories now. They'll help sustain you when your "baby" has left the nest.
Congrats on taking such a big step of faith. I'm so happy for you, that you're taking such leaps in your faithwalk, and that you and the DH are on the same page re your decisions. 🙂
We only have one life here on earth, and as long as we're following God's will, we'll be able to make the most of it. 🙂 I'm happy to hear that you're following His leading, though it does sound like it'll be tough at first!
Good for you! The decision to "quit my day job" was made for me when the publishing company I worked at for 12 years phased out my job and had nothing else to offer me. I'd always dreamed of being full-time freelance but did not have the courage, especially since my income was two-thirds of what we lived on. But I'd had a good year on the freelance side of my life with money in the bank, and a separation package that would keep us going for a while,so I realized I had an opportunity to try it. We decided we could afford to give it a year, and if it wasn't a going concern then, I'd look for a job. I'm now in my seventh year and have six novels under contract. So for me, circumstances I did not choose turned out to be my moment and I have no regrets.
Wow, Katie, big decision! I love you you looked at it both rationally and sought God's will….the perfect combination! I wish you all the best as you embark on this new journey…God bless!
You are SO doing the right thing. I am proud of you. You will never get these years back again, and you will never regret raising your son for yourself, but you may regret not raising him if you worked while he was tiny.
YES!!!
Congratulations, Katie!!!
I quit work after having my first child, things were tight, and when it got too tight remarkably my old employer called me out of the blue asking for me to return if even as a contract position. Considering I was a few months pregnant with my second child at the time, I went with the contract and on a part-time basis so that I could still be with my first born more than I wasn't. After an eight month leave with our second daughter, they called me back again. Things were still tight, baby was doing well, so I went back again part-time and again part-time after our third child.
By the time our third child started kindergarten work was pressuring me into going full-time, hubby had had several wage increases and then he started traveling with his job more, so I quit work all together. Volunteered lots in the school with all three of my daughters' teachers.
I've never looked back. 2 1/2 to 3 days work/week was enough to keep us afloat back then with the unpaid months I had off inbetween contracts and having kids. Once the money was there for me to be a full time mom again, we took it. And you know, my kids are very studious and respect the school system and learning so much, that I know my heavy involvement in volunteering in their school helped instill that.
Remarkably enough, it was after all three were in school and I quit being a systems analyst for the final time that God brought writing into my life, too.
All the best to you, Katie, and may you find enormous joy in being a stay-at-home mom!!!
You will never regret your decision! I continued working for a while when my oldest was little, but I just couldn't keep up with everything. On paper, the budget didn't look do-able, but God always provided. It's been 9 years and I have loved being home. My youngest starts kindergarten in 18 months, so I'll be starting another chapter then.
Congratulations!
Katie,
Congrats!
My husband and I made a similar decision before our first was born. We also did a test run before we took the leap. And, to be honest, things were tight, and tighter, and super-tight to where we were counting coins to pay for essentials. But, a little discipline never hurts, and we made it to where we learned the most important things (always less than we think we need). Now, 13 years later, I wouldn't change the journey for anything. It does go too fast with kids, even when I've been home every day. You have some great priorities lined up. You won't regret it. Wonderful news, Katie. You'll do great! xo JK
Yeah!
I love the thought & prayer you put into making this decision. May God honor it.
Yes, deciding to have our third child was a big deal. We had to overcome fear and come to a point of trust that no matter what happened it was in God's hands.
Love that pic. of you in the hospital. Such a sweet mama!
~ Wendy
Enjoy the days with your little man. You're right, they go by in a blink. My Eldest graduates college in a couple of weeks. The Young One is finishing her freshman year in college. I never regretted leaving my career behind to stay home with my girlies. I did miss my paycheck but we managed.
Kids grow way too fast. For me it was the decision not to go back to work once my kids were all in school. We'd been living off that budget so that was okay. It had more to do with being there for my kids after school and if they were sick then it had to do with my writing. Okay, that did play a small role.
What a wonderful move for you!
I know what you mean about time accelerating! I've had to pause and take stock of the last decade recently. I don't ever remember 10 years going by so fast! 5 kids, 3 moves and several changes of job I now feel that things are more stable. Time isn't passing any less slowly, though. I feel like if I close my eyes for a second, I'll miss a year.
Big decision? Moving from a comfortable life in the south of England to the Big Unknown on a pretty remote Scottish island. How did I do it? Faith. In my wife (it was her idea), in my kids (only 2 of them at the time) and in that it felt like the right thing to do. Would I do it again? In a heartbeat.
I wish you the very best in this endeavour.