My students surprised me on Thursday. They made me a really touching power point and they all brought flowers (hence the picture). I about cried. It was the sweetest thing. Especially since they organized it on their own.
Anyway, I’m leaving.
I’m setting out on a new adventure.
Today is my last day in the classroom.
Maybe temporarily. Maybe permanently. Who knows. The fact is, when August rolls around and my coworkers and friends are getting back into the classroom, putting up bulletin boards and figuring out class lists, I won’t be joining them.
It’s bittersweet.
I’ll miss the students. I will really miss the students. Especially this year’s class. A class of writers and goofballs. Kids with quick smiles and contagious laughs. They wound their way into my heart in such a deep way.
But I won’t miss all the other stuff that comes with teaching.
And I absolutely won’t miss being away from home nine hours out of the day. I will love, love, love having more time being a wife, a mother, and a writer. I will love having more time, period.
However, the other day, my dad and I were having a conversation that made me pause. Reflect. We were talking about retirees and how they often feel like they have less time than they did when they worked. They experience a sort of where-has-this-day-gone phenomenon.
I’ve been thinking about that phenomenon. Stewing over it a bit. Trying to figure out how this could be. How could having more time make a person feel like they have less? Here’s what I came up with:
Sometimes, having more time makes us less disciplined. And being less disciplined affects the way we use our time.
Sometimes, having more time makes us take that time for granted. And taking our hours for granted affects how productively we use them.
This makes sense. I mean, as a full-time working mama who also writes, I had to squeeze the most out of every minute. I had to be diligent. Incredibly disciplined. Now, there will be that temptation. That temptation to sit back and say, “I’ve got all the time in the world. Why not relax?”
I don’t know about you, but I want to fight that temptation. I want to make sure I don’t find myself at home, getting less done than I did when I worked as a full-time teacher.
So I’ve come up with a game plan. Four things I plan to do to make the most of my time:
Protect the time I’ve always had.
Just because I don’t have to be somewhere, doesn’t mean I should get up later. My writing time has always been in the morning, before my son wakes up. I’m not going to change that now. My alarm clock will beep at the same time it always has.
Make and stick to a schedule.
I’m a fan of schedules. It’s the teacher in me. It’s the mother in me. It’s the control-freak in me. Whatever it is, I like them. Schedules offer a sense of security and bring order to the day. They ensure that there is a time to play, a time to nap. A time to clean, a time to cook. A time to read, a time to write. Anybody feel like they’re reading Ecclesiastes?
Write short and long term goals.
I’m also a fan of goal-setting. They give me purpose and focus. The biggest thing I’ve learned, when it comes to goals, is to physically write them down. Not just think them. But write them. So I’m going to buy a notebook and record all my goals in one place.
Assess and adjust.
Just like a good little teacher checks in with her students and adjusts her instruction as needed, I need to check in with myself and adjust my routine and habits as needed. How am I doing as a wife? As a mother? As a writer? Where am I dropping the ball? How can I improve?
I’m going to cling tightly to these four tips and hopefully, I won’t find myself saying, “Man, I should have all this extra time. So why does it feel like I have less?”
Let’s Talk: Do you find that the more time you have, the more lax you get about getting things done? Any tips for me or others who are making similar transitions?
Yes there should realize the opportunity to RSS commentary, quite simply, CMS is another on the blog.
Thanks, Katie! I have all these summer plans and goals in my head, but I REALLY need to write them down. I'm sure I won't get to them all, but I will probably do a whole lot more if I have them staring me in the face!
Congratulations on all the exciting changes! You've got a great plan in place. It's tricky working from home … I sometimes miss going into the office. People will see that you are 'at home' and assume you're available, and it will be up to you to say, 'no, I'm at work … this is my work time'.
Katie, you hit the target! Now that I'm back in the workforce, every minute is put to good use.
Example: I no longer sit and stare at my slow computer while it boots up. I make my lunch for work, breakfast, or straighten my desk. (Yeah, it's that slow!)
Blessings,
Susan 🙂
Good advice Katie!
I have to apply your advice to my life but not in my writing. I have a home based business. I like what I do but I love to write. I find too many days I rush the through the #1 priorities in my business and then I write. It's time for some structure and scheduling in all things!
Thanks.
Hey girlie, wooohooo on staying home!! I can't wait to see you in Sept. and see how you're doing.
My biggest piece of advice is DON'T turn on the TV during the day. It's a major timesuck to anything you might want to get done. Also, watch out for the internet. Keep those things to a minimum and you'll probably accomplish all sorts of things. 🙂
WOW! I totally remember my last day of teaching when I knew that I would not be coming back. I was excited, scared, sad. So many emotions- and when the first day of school rolled around, it was weird to be sitting at home (this was 5 years ago). It is a bittersweet thing.
Good for you for the goals that you've set on your day–I've been home 5 years now and I'm still trying to figure out my day/routine. Certain things are scheduled (breakfast, lunch, naps, etc), but that's about it. I used to write during naptime, but since the oldest doesn't "nap" anymore, it is becoming harder.
Good luck with everything! I can't wait to hear all about this new adventure!!
What a perfect question! I stopped working after my first child, but didn't start writing until I was pregnant with my second so I already had my routine down as far as the whole playing with the kiddos, personal time, cleaning stuff goes.
When I bit the bullet and decided I was going to try my hand in something I had wanted to do since highschool, I had a hard time figuring out how to do it. I felt exactly the way you described, like there were not enough hours in a day.
Being a work-at-home mom takes a lot of discipline but it sounds like you are going to have no problems.
I think I need to write these 4 tips down form myself:)
I'm glad I'm not the only one like this. The more I have on my plate, so to speak, the lazier I get. It's like my inner rebel who refuses to do anything. Having good friends and blog buddies can help with the motivation!
Congrats on your new venture!
You are sooooooo wise. I've written almost 10 books (5 of them published), and I've NEVER had a huge chunk of time to write. I've never been on a writing retreat or even written a word at a coffee shop. 🙂 My youngest starts afternoon kindergarten in the fall (1:00-3:30), and I'm more than a little fearful that I'll fritter that time away. Thanks for the inspiration!!
Katie, congrats on the new beginnings! So excited to see your extra time bring more writing/books and more precious moments with your family.
I do get lazy at times that's for sure. At this stage in my life with teens now I find a lot of my time is tied up in chauffering and watching their events. I'm struggling with how much of that I want to give up for writing when I know the years left with them are so few. Some how I have to figure out what balance is best for me and family.
Your students sound wonderful, Katie! May you find staying home to be all you imagine it to be!!
I can so relate!! When my youngest went off to college, I thought I had so much more time. But I frittered it away thinking I had so much. I love your suggestion to write down the goals. I set two goals, but I think if I write and post them, they'll be a visible reminder to keep focused. Thanks for the tip!
Susan
This really solved my problem, thank you!
I would love to be a stay-at-home writer. Though I think I would have to take my lead from you, Katie, and create a strict schedule. I find my mind very easily wanders into the "I should be doing this other thing instead of writing" mode if I'm not careful.
Great post, great questions.
And yes, sometimes time gets away from me. (Like now, I should be writing my WIP, not visiting blogs. LOL)
And it's summer–I need to figure out how writing is going to work now that my daughter's schedule is officially "Summertime and the living is easy."
And congrats on being home come the fall!
I hope your last day was a blessed one! You will do just fine keeping your priorities set. 🙂
First of all, congratulations on coming to the end of this phase of your life (even if only temporarily). I'm sure it's a time of mixed feelings, but I think it's great that you're going to give full time writing a shot.
I think that your goals are both realistic and wise. It's going to be a time of transition for you, but I think you're set up very well for success. Good luck!
Katie – Your post is so "right on". I think your pause to think of how this schedule change will really pan out is so wise. I can remember listening to grandparents talk about this retirement phenomenon, but in going through the different stages of being a stay at home mom, working & not, going to school & not, I've come to realize that I innately work better under pressure. It's all too easy when my days are lighter to float through them & then find a whole summer has gone by with nothing much accomplished!
It will be a joy to follow you on this journey, and I begin a new one myself. After being a stay at home mom with little ones under foot & then transitioning to homeschooling mom, my youngest is going off to public high school this upcoming year. What to do what to do??
Denise
Katie – Your post is so "right on". I think your pause to think of how this schedule change will really pan out is so wise. I can remember listening to grandparents talk about this retirement phenomenon, but in going through the different stages of being a stay at home mom, working & not, going to school & not, I've come to realize that I innately work better under pressure. It's all too easy when my days are lighter to float through them & then find a whole summer has gone by with nothing much accomplished!
It will be a joy to follow you on this journey, and I begin a new one myself. After being a stay at home mom with little ones under foot & then transitioning to homeschooling mom, my youngest is going off to public high school this upcoming year. What to do what to do??
Denise
I totally feel like I have less time when I have more time! It is so weird! You do become less disciplined when you have a ton of time on your hands unless you are really aware of that tendancy and fight to stop it! Sounds like you have a good plan in mind to keep that from happening. Enjoy the extra time you'll have writing and being with the fam!
Congratulations and best of luck on your new journey! I loved this post!
My husband is finishing school and then when he gets himself a great job of his dreams I'll get mine. I'm so excited to have a goal in mind. A few years from now I'll have more time.
For now I'll stick with both full-time jobs – the one that pays and the writing.
This is a great post.
I've learned (the hard way) that, if I want to get anything done, I have to be incredibly disciplined. Even though I don't have an 8-5 job I put on pantyhose to go to, I am still up early each morning to "show up" for my writing job. Know what I'm saying?
Rachel Vincent, one of my favorite authors, once said she told herself if she didn't treat writing like her job, it would never be her job.
I've quoted that to people and had them quibble with me because they want to use the word career. Whatever word you use, though, the meaning is there. If you want to have a job/career writing, you have to treat it seriously.
Good for you for realizing it going in.
Katie, I'm so happy for this new stage in your life, and glad you got to have a nice treat from your students to remember them by 🙂
I remember when I stopped working to stay at home full time, and it was a strange transition that didn't feel smooth or organized at all. I spent a lot of time not really enjoying my new job as mother because I wasn't as organized and everything felt so different.
My biggest life-saver is schedules and lists. I write a list every week of what I want to get done and I cross items off daily. Balancing writing staying at home was a little harder because I didn't want to take time away from the kids but I felt like I needed to write during the day. I had to make a schedule for that, too. And even though my writing times vary each day, I still have a goal for each day and work around my plans to make sure I get it all done.
Claim it and own it. That's the only way to make it work. People start asking for your time and talents and pretty soon you're giving them all away. Your husband starts thinking that you're just sitting around all day so why isn't the laundry, dinner and chores done before he gets home. The kids think it's play time. No one will give you the time you need. You must I'm going to work, even when I don't leave the house.
Best wishes! You can do it.
Best wishes to you, Katie!
Embrace your new life…and keep close the memories of the old…
It's always hard to make a change. I've felt that way everytime I've left a job, but I've never regretted it.
In regards to time, I can totally relate. I get more stuff done on my days off right now, because I know it's the only time I have. I'm not sure what would happen if I got to stay home full time, but I would love to find out.
Great plan, Katie.
I hope your final day in the classroom isn't too tough. I'm married to a teacher, so I know how much of themselves educators invest in their students. I love what your students did for you. Shows what a beloved teacher you are. =)
Okay, here's my advice: give yourself a vacation, but set a limit on it. Then make a strict schedule. I've never worked a full-time job since I've had children, but I've done a little part time and went to college full time. The short vacation is often necessary to refocus and mentally gear up for a change in schedule.
Huge congratulations to fulfilling this long-held dream of yours! And as to your question and thoughts on it–I think it's important to distinguish exactly what our role at home is.
I had years of being a stay-at-home mother. They were thrilling, boring, exhausting, uplifting. I loved it! But my kids grew and I entered a new phase–the work-at-home-mother. Now, writing is my full-time job during the school year and my part-time job in the summer. I'm very disciplined and I guard my time.
I will say it's challenging to take on both roles. I've given up almost all my free time to prioritize my kids and my writing, but it works for me.
Good luck!!
OH Kaite!!!! I'm SO excited for you! I worked for seven years (actually longer if you count internships) and when I left my job I was SOOOO happy to be a stay at home mom! I prayed for that gift the entire seven years. I was very envious of those who could stay home, but I had to wait until the Lord blessed us with that gift. I already had three little boys at home and was homeschooling the oldest so the transition felt natural. Of course I then got pregnant with my daughter immediately and that was another hearts desire the Lord gave me at that time in my life.
I remember my first day home, even the air felt a little bit sweeter.
Enjoy your new life!
I stick to a schedule as well. All your tips for productivity are great. Okay, occasionally I put off mopping. 😉
I'm so excited for this change in your life, Katie!
And yes, I've struggled with the time element. I'm finding the question of "where did my day go?" being the result of changing diapers for an hour straight and cleaning messes. Seriously. Being home with the kids has made me appreciate their previous caregivers sooo much more!
That said, discipline is an absolute must. And it sounds like you're on the right track.
You may find what I have, that my biggest battle now is guilt. Don't get me wrong. I felt guilty about my writing taking up family time before. But now that my children ARE my day job, it gets extra tricky to avoid the guilt of neglecting my duties or my children for writing. Granted, if you've got a schedule made and stick to it, that will help. But I'd say just brace yourself for those moments when the guilt hits and be prepared to forgive yourself often. 🙂
I'm a big believer in goal setting and guarding writing time. 🙂
Have a great last day at school!
I admit it…Im a lazy person. The more time I have, the less disciplined I am just as you said. I like deadlines – they keep me honest.
Good stuff, Kate…so true! Enjoy your last day at school, you fabulous teacher you!
Katie – I so needed this today! I've been a SAHM for about 10 years and my youngest will start school soon. So theoretically, I'll have all this time to write. Over the last 10 years though, I've become very undisciplined… I'm able to get everything accomplished for my children and husband, but when it comes writing (or exercising or anything that benefits me exclusively), I have no idea how to start. So usually I waste my precious time browsing the web, organizing and reorganizing closets, etc…
I appreciate the tips!! And best wishes to you on this big change!
I'm insanely disciplined (and insanely mad at Blogger right now).
I've found it's true, I make time for what I'm most passionate about.
Congratulations on wrapping up the year and that stage of your life.
I know you are going to love next year!!!
~ Wendy
I've been writing fulltime from home for six years now. I had to learn to walk past the sink full of dishes and the carpet begging for the vaccuum. Thinking "I'll just do this one thing" was probably the biggest time-sucker in the beginning. So I do maintain a schedule and when I'm working, I'm working. On the other hand, I've enjoyed the flexibility that working from home brings. I can respond to the neighbor who needs an afternoon favor or the friend who spontaneously asks if I want to meet for coffee. These things build relational richness into my life–and working alone day after day does cause a social adjustment. So give yourself some grace to enjoy the perks of being self-employed within the boundaries you've set.
Katie, so glad you had that talk with your dad and you are prepared for this new (exciting!) season in life. Yes, take it from me, someone who's written full time for many years, it takes tremendous discipline to keep getting up at 5am every morning when there's no paycheck riding on doing so, no boss expecting to see my chipper face. It's hard sometimes not to let that lunch break stretch beyond reasonable bounds, or to head out and run errands every single day (ok, gas prices are helping curb that particular impulse!). A prayer I offer to the Lord each morning before writing goes along these lines, "Help me to stay focused today. Help me to be disciplined. Help me to stay in that chair and write for the hours I know I'm capable of putting in today, when I'm tempted to quit early, or the scene is difficult, or the words don't flow." Not every day is hard though. Some days are pure magic and you can't drag me away from the book. Discipline is a habit you already have, so you aren't starting from scratch!
Great post, Katie! You are wise to think and plan ahead. Obviously, you won't be writing for those nine hours you were previously away from home. There are other things you missed as well as writing that you will now have time for. But, it sounds like you will be putting in many hours of work each day, the two hours in the morning, and at whatever time you decide to make you other writing period(s). There will be challenges, unexpected new routines, and many new joys of motherhood that emerge, but I have no doubt that you will continue to produce good work with the same level of commitment! One day you may return to the classroom, but as a guest speaker with your latest book for Young Adults. Who knows where the Lord will lead you, but I feel certain that you will follow!
This is so true! I think you've hit it exactly right! Can I feature this post on my blog because I think it would help so many people!
I'm both excited and sad for your new life change too. I have a feeling that you'll be fulfilled no matter what you do because of your great attitude. Good luck, Katie!
I work so many different schedules in a given year, yet I find that I'm fairly disciplined. I so get that "where-did-this-day-go" syndrome! My advice? Do celebrate your different schedule, even if it's only for a day or two. Celebrate that you don't have to be somewhere early in the morning a couple of times, or you will wonder why you even left that schedule. Then? Like you said, set a schedule, get to work, the reevaluate as needed. That's pretty much what I do. Congratulations, Katie, on finishing another year!! I celebrate the teachers (like you) who mean so much to the young. I can only hope a teacher like you is making an impact on my daughter, the writer.
Katie, this one speaks to me. I am at the point where I can work part time and write part time. I used to waste time the more time I had but finally overcame that with setting a schedule. Getting up, showering and heading to the library after school drop off forces me to go to my "writing job". Then I reward myself with coming home, having lunch and spending the afternoon editing (easier than "creating" at home with distractions around!). I also make sure I dont bring my library card to the library – hence not allowing me to log in to the internet! Forced writing…works for me. Otherwise I would sit at home wasting all that wonderful time. Congrats to you on making the decision to leave your job and have more time to write. That must have been a difficult one. You will do fantastic things! Even more so 😉 Good luck!
I'm at home writing full time but I have a schedule. I definitely get in more than 2 hours of writing a day while still cleaning and exercising and doing mom stuff.
I find I do much better when I stick to a routine. And, as a parent, you're always teaching, but you knew that. (-;
I can so relate to this! When I worked, everything got done. Now I'm at home, things get done 'tomorrow'. Or never.
Your plan to get up at the same time is a good one. Also, make sure you get dressed straight away. For sme reason, on days where I'm late getting dressed I get less done. 🙂