A process occurs while revising, a level of intimacy develops, whereby a story turns from acquaintance to lover. I’m not quite sure how it happens. Perhaps its the long hours spent in its company. Or the depth to which an author explores its caveats, nuances, and quirks. Or the heart and soul a writer pours onto the pages. Whatever it is, when it happens, it’s really sort of beautiful.
A couple weeks ago, I wrote a post about how much revising terrified me. I read Wishing on Willows and felt distant, like I didn’t really know my story. Imagine my chagrin when I realized that all the time I spent writing the rough draft amounted to nothing more than the casual, “Hi, how are you?”
My novel sat, waiting for me to make a move, and the thought of diving in, getting intimate, intimidated me. I went through all those common first date doubts. “What if I’m not good enough for him?” “What if I say something stupid?” “What if we don’t click?” “What if he’s not who I think he is?” Then you go on the date and feel 75% uneasy the entire time, unsure what to say or how to act. The second date is a little better. The third one a lot better. Until all of a sudden you’re as familiar with your story as Solomon was with his beloved.
As I spend time pouring over my words, my plot and my characters, I discover the core essence of what I want to say. I realize what brought me to write this novel in the first place. I learn what to accentuate, what to delete, what to add, what to twist and turn. Somewhere from the rough draft through the plethora of revisions, I understand what my story really is. And the fear I felt in the beginning turns to excitement. Thoughts of my story consume me. I’m committed and in love and desperate to give my lover all the attention it deserves, so the beauty I witness in private can be shared with the world.
Questions to Ponder: Do you feel you know your story after the first draft? Or do you need several go-throughs before you can claim intimacy with your work?
I find myself totally wrapped up in a story as I'm writing it. In fact, there are so I'm sad to finish.
But when I go back and reread later, I either like it even better, or I enter a love-hate relationship (I hate it and tear it apart, but only because I'm so attached to the story and want it to be good).
What a great comparison, Katie! I love how you think.
I revise and rewrite and rework until I am ready to regurgitate! I am intimate with my works 'til I either adore them or get sick of 'em. Mostly adore…
I tend to get very attached to my characters in the first draft. It's their environment that I don't see as clearly at first so I work a lot on setting and description during my revisions. After several run-throughs I begin to get tired of everything, people, plot and place, and wonder if I'm making it better or worse by continuing to tweak.
It's amazing to me how differently we all write!! I feel that way about my story the first time through. It's in the following readings that I try to give myself the distance to read and look at it more objectively! It's been fun to learn more about how you write, Katie! Thanks for sharing!!
great post! This is exactly how I felt when I began my revision. I had no clue what to do, or what the story was about. I felt as if I really didn't know my characters at all. I am now on my 14th revision and I finally feel as if this is it. I know them, I know what they want to say, the point they are trying to make. They are always on my mind, night and day.
Great post:) Yes, I have to read it a few times before that love relationship begins to develop and like you, then I start to remember why I was so hot on writing the story:)
Necessity is the mother of invention..........................
It's definitely like marriage, in that, the more you are with someone, the more you listen to his inner workings and try to understand, even if you can't completely get all of who he is, the more you do fall in love, and know you will never abandon him. π Glad you found your way back to love!
I love this analogy! It's so true, each time I pass through my work I feel like I get a deeper understanding of who my characters really are. That's when they start takin on a life of their own and doing things that surprise even me. That is one of the best rewards as a writer, I think.
That's an interesting analogy. Because I am a big-time planner, I feel as though my plotting stage is essentially my first draft. All the initial uncertainties and worries go in there. By the time I get to writing the story, I've fallen in love and I can't wait to start the relationship.
I usually do. I can't write a story unless I'm in love with it. Returning to edit (or even rewrite) is like getting reaquainted with old friends. So fun!
I didn't fall in love with my characters until the last time I rewrote it, or at least I think it's the last time I'm going to rewrite it…I really do love them and the story now thought. I think we have something special going on π
I didn't fall in love with my characters, with my story, until my second read-through.
Katie, this is such a good analogy. And you presented it in such a relatable way. Thanks for that.
I agree, I really do. Maybe we don't allow ourselves to get attached the first time through, because there are so many what ifs. But then when it's time to revise, we've already proven a lot to ourselves, and we can relax, let that intimacy in. I see it.
I love this! I always think I know my story, but after revisions, I realize it was more a friendship than true love.
I feel the same way sometimes. When I wrote my first draft it was exciting and when I was done I did feel intimidated and worried. A prayer usually helps, though π
Good luck.
This is a great post!
I often feel like a stranger when I go back and read the first draft. I've forgotten sub-plots or a character quirk somewhere along the way.
I'm on Revision 5 right now- we've definitely got a groove now, more like a couple a few years into the marriage.
Oooh, I like this. I'm definitely diving deeper and getting more intimate during the revision, and I like becoming best friends even beyond the lover stage.
I need about fifty go-throughs. Which is frustrating for me, because I want it to be perfect the first time. But like any relationship, there's this constant ebb and flow. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's not. It's the same with writing.
Like right now, I don't like my book very much. π
Katie, the usual apropos post!
Each of my "relationships" have been different. I LOVED book number one before we ever were formally introduced on paper because it was the life of my best friend. Book number two pulled in snippets of my life, and I had a love-hate, tumultuous, slamming doors in each others' faces relationship.
Sigh, book three, the love of my life, started as a friend and blossomed. Sigh.
Book four has been hard to get to know. So secretive. Masked. Like China.
Blessings,
Patti
http://www.pattilacy.com/blog
What a fun analogy!
I love the revision process, polishing the rough stone into something smooth and shiny.
You sound a lot like a sculptor actually. Taking your piece of marble (novel) and using your chisel (red pen) until your beautiful stone is turned into a piece of art. Very inspiring.
Personally, I tend to fall in love with the idea of what I'm writing and hope it manifests itself on the page the way I envisioned.
No I don't feel like I totally know the story until after a few go throughs. Great analogy.
Love how you compared it to dating. all us old time married couples have to really dig deep to remember those butterflies and getting to know the intimacies of another. :O)
I feel the first round is very intimate but I love to edit and I know that's where the real magic happens. I wish I could continue loving my WIPs though, I'm not sure why I keep moving on to a different one. I really need to grasp hold of one and get and agent.
The more I work on them the more I fall in love with them. My problem is whether or not that's making them better? I'm still unsure on that!
I loved this. I think my story keeps trying to bring me flowers and I'm not sure whether to eat them or smell them. Oh, I won't bother to explain that one. Or my story and I have been together so long it keeps taking the remote control. I need to snatch it back.
So fun to think in these terms. I still hate commas. I show them no love.
~ Wendy
Does Ryan know about this? JK π This was a great post…can't wait to read it!
I'm a big-time plotter, so I feel like my first drafts go deeper than the average "pantser's" would. But the editing process still involves a lot of layering and fine-tuning some of the things I skimmed over in the first round.
I've had an intimate relationship with my novel for the last decade–it's the story of my heart. But you know what? It's been more of an Edward Cullen type fantasy crush…until recently.
I wrote the story, but like you said, it felt distant. I knew a lot about my characters, but I didn't know their true cores. It was almost as if I was listening at the door with my ear pressed to a glass. But once I dug deeper and got to know their true hearts' desires, that's when our relationships went to a new level. Now they are sharing secrets that have surprised me, but make the story stronger. I love them in spite of their flaws. Now we have an unconditional love relationship–like the one God has with us.
Great post, Katie. Thanks for sharing!
LOL! I've never heard the rewriting process compared quite like that, but it's a good analogy!
For me, when I get back into it, it's like it's this ugly guy that I've forced to have a date with even though I want to gag at the sight of his overweight, zit-filled face and the fact he still lives with his momma. (Okay, that's mean… sorry!) But… as I go along… he loses a few pounds, acne clears up, he gets a job as a doctor and moves into a nice mansion. By the time we're ready to get married, he's the man of my dreams.
(I sound really superficial… I promise I'm not!)
As artists, I think we know our work or stories, but there's an elusive "it" that we try to capture. When we look at our work and feel it's not quite right, we go back to the drawing board to get "it".
Katie that fear has overwhelmed me at times. But it is always before I start to write the first draft. As I'm writing the first one, I get excited and happy. When I write, I fall in love with my characters and begin to think of them as real people. If I don't consider them real, I cannot make my story seem real. And readers want to feel as though they are in your world and that it is real as they turn the pages of your story.
Wonderful post. Thanks. π
Oooo, good post. I think I'm still at the awkward stage! lol I'm just now deepening my love and passion again for my WIP that I am editing. I'm beginning to understand what you are saying!!!!
I certainly want to go deeper after the first draft. I feel a lot like the comparison Anne Lamott used in Bird by Bird, about our stories being a developing polarid.
Things are still a bit fuzzy on my end.