Yearning

Not sure if it’s my mood or the day or the time of year or what, but I’m feeling quite reflective right now. The kind of reflective where I’d like to escape to a cabin, Henry David Thoreau style, with just my laptop and my Bible and see what happens.

I have this yearning inside me. This yearning to write fiction that matters. It’s like my heart aches to make some sort of eternal impact with my words.

You see, there’s this story stirring in my soul, only it has no shape or form. No plot or structure. It’s just lurking somewhere in the corners of my mind. Growing. Shrinking. Flickering on and off like a half screwed light bulb. Every now and then, I’ll hear a song, or see a person, or feel some emotion, or read some Bible verse, and it’s like a glimpse into this phantom story. Like a sneak peek into something both familiar and foreign. I can make out the blurry edges and my desire swells. I wish I could cast out a net and reign the story in. I wish it would come to me in all its shapely glory. I wish I could sit in front of my computer and let the words pour from my fingertips. But it remains distant. Like it’s not ready to be told quite yet. Or maybe it’s me. Maybe I’m not ready to tell it. I hope someday I will be.

Until then, I will continue to write the stories that do come.

Question to Ponder: Do you ever feel the urge to create something larger than yourself?removetweetmeme

3 C’s – It’s Friday!

Cares:
I have a friend. She is truly one of the most beautiful, inspiring, authentic individuals I know. Our lives have traveled down parallel roads, pretty much identical, only a month apart. Through first love breakups, proposals, weddings, buying our first dogs (both black labs), and our five-year plans (where we’d enjoy married life for 5 years before entering parenthood). And here we are. Only I have a 14-month old boy while she’s spent the past fourteen months staring at negative pregnancy tests with no explanation as to why. She just started a blog. I invite you, and encourage you, to hop on over to the Lemonade Stand and follow Holly on her journey toward motherhood. I promise you’ll leave inspired.

Concerns:
Exercise. I’m so unmotivated it’s ridiculous.

The teething never ends, does it?

Celebrations:
I’m in the thick of revisions for Wishing on Willows and I’m really starting to fall in love with this story. I’m almost done morphing two characters into one, which has involved a lot of rewriting. But the effort’s proved fruitful. Instead of two flat, stereotypical secondary characters, I now have one strong, three-dimensional character who packs a lot of punch.

I’ve got high hopes for 2010.

God’s grace. When I really let myself sit and ponder its beauty, its nonsensical nature, its defiance of all things logical, I’m left breathless. Captivated. Wowed. And in love.

Question to Ponder: What are your cares, concerns, and celebrations this windy, ridiculously frigid Friday morning?removetweetmeme

An Agent-Client Analogy

My Job
As a teacher, I have twenty-four students. Twenty-four kiddos with different needs and abilities, all entrusted in my care. A huge part of my job is to teach them, get them ready for life.

Another part of my job is interacting with parents. Parents who want the best for their children. Parents who sometimes can’t always see their child correctly, because, well, it’s hard when you’re that close. Part of my job is to be honest with parents, but to do so with tact and grace. Part of my job is to answer parents questions, address concerns, listen, offer advice, ensure them I’m doing everything in my ability to help their child succeed.

The Analogy
Just like parents send their children off to school, trusting the teacher will get their child ready for the world, clients send their manuscript off to their agent, trusting the agent will get their manuscript ready for submission – ready to be a published book!

Just like teachers face twenty-four students with varying needs and abilities, agents face a whole stack of manuscripts at different stages in the submission process.

And just like teachers communicate with parents about their children, agents communicate with clients about their manuscripts.

I always tell parents that we’re a team. Their child will receive the best education if we work together and communicate. Same goes for agents and clients. They work together and communicate so their book can receive the best possible chance at publication.

One Step Further
Sometimes it’s hard being a teacher. There’s only one of me and twenty-four of them. Sometimes I wish I could clone myself – then maybe I could get everything done in a day that I’d like to accomplish. I’m sure agents feel the same. Only they usually have more than twenty-four clients. And those clients usually have more than one manuscript. Agents have to juggle a lot of balls at one time. And (most of them) manage to juggle so gracefully.

Two Steps Further
Teachers tend to be underpaid, overworked, and under appreciated. Newsflash: We don’t teach for the money, or the glory. We teach because we love kids. We love seeing them reach their potential. Love seeing them thrive. Love calling parents to tell them their son or daughter had a fantastic day at school. I’m willing to bet it’s the same for agents. I can’t imagine many agents are in this for the money or the glory. I think most agents do what they do because they love books and they love writers.

One Last Thought
When I emailed Jody Hedlund to squee with her about Rachelle offering me representation, she emailed me something that made me smile, because I totally felt the same way. She said: It’s like we’re kids, and we just found out we’re in the same class.

So true. After I got the call, I was jumping around like a soon-to-be 5th grader who just found out she got her favorite teacher. “I got Mrs. Gardner! I got Mrs. Gardner!” And to top it off, I knew two of my really good friends were already in her class.

Questions to Ponder: What “teacher” do you have? Or what “teacher” are you hoping for?removetweetmeme