Anybody else have a mile long, ever growing to-do list?
I don’t think I’m alone.
Life has been crazy here in the Ganshert household. Cra-zy.
We have all this educational stuff we have to get through for our adoption. I’m talking, pages and pages of homework and hours and hours of video that detail all the problems we may face in the future.
We’re organizing a Silent Auction/Trivia Night to help raise funds. And wow….
Rounding up donations + coming up with trivia questions + spreading the word so people will come + all the other odds and ends = one gargantuan time commitment.
Then there’s that book that just released. Wildflowers from Winter. Seeing as I wrote the thing, I should probably be promoting it. Which is an insane (albeit very fun) time commitment in and of itself.
It’s no surprise then, that I had my first official melt down last week.
Allow me to state the obvious:
Adoption is not an easy journey.
Combine that with all the nutty emotions that come with debuting a novel and yeah….
I felt angry that it was this hard to be a forever family to an orphan when there are so, so, so many out there.
I felt ridiculously worried over all the unknowns that lay (or lie?) ahead.
I felt like a bad mom because I wasn’t giving Brogan the attention he deserved.
I felt like a bad wife because I was taking some of these emotions out on my husband.
I felt resentful and overwhelmed and stressed out.
So I emailed two of my closest friends. Basically hurled all my junk into cyber space. Apologized for the delightful pity party I was throwing myself. Got into the shower and cried. Not a pretty cry either. But an ugly, scrunchy-faced cry.
When I got out, I hugged my son for a really long time.
And later, I opened my email and read this:
I think we have tendencies to go on and on pretending we are doing just fine and trusting God, but deep down we are quickly getting worn out and beat up. I honestly think pity parties are God’s way of letting that all rise to the surface so we can face it all, get support/encouragement from others, and start to process through all the muck that life throws at us (seemingly all at once).
My friend, she knows me well. Because I do have a tendency to forge ahead and pretend everything is good.
But in that shower, when I was having that ugly cry, God brought me face to face with all kinds of gunk that needed processing. All kinds of gunk that needed surrendering.
I also read this:
Take ONE thing at a time. Don’t think about the whole…just pick one and then cross it off the list.
Ryan and I went to Minneapolis this past weekend and on the drive, there was a long stretch of construction. Workers were tearing up an entire road. There were piles of rocks, miles and miles long, that needed to be crushed and carted away. Looking ahead, the job seemed impossible. There wasn’t an end in sight.
Yet on our way home, only two days later, those construction workers were already halfway done.
I have no idea if the workers worked the entire time with their eyes on the never ending piles of rocks ahead. Daunted and overwhelmed.
Or if they focused on one rock pile at a time. Talking and enjoying the sun.
Both involve the same work.
One makes for a much happier construction worker.
It’s like that cliche…
How do you eat an elephant?
One bite at a time.
In this crazy busy often-overwhelming thing called life, we need to focus on one bite at a time.
And we should remember to laugh and hug and pray and play and breathe and process and enjoy life in between the bites.
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. -Matthew 6:34
Let’s Talk: What bite are you working on today? What do you do when you’re feeling overwhelmed?
Kathy Harris interviewed me on Divine Detour yesterday. Hop on over for a chance to win a free copy of my debut novel!