If you haven’t noticed, Katie likes to get all spiritual on Wednesdays. So when I started looking for an opportunity to introduce myself, to tell my side of the story, I was hoping for a Monday or a Friday. Anything but a Wednesday. Yet here I am and we all know what day it is.
I figure I should take what I can get.
My name is Bethany Quinn. Wildflowers from Winter is my story. And I’m here to tell you that Katie and I haven’t exactly seen eye to eye lately.
We used to be fine. We used to coexist in peace. Until she started talking about Peaks. Until she got it in her head that I should go back.
I keep telling her she doesn’t understand what she’s asking.
Because unlike me, she likes her hometown.
To her, home is a happy place. With two loving parents, a perfectly respectable house, and a bunch of nostalgic memories.
She never had to deal with death. Or unwanted stares. Or whispers and gossip and speculation that tiptoed much too close to the truth.
Her memories frolic. My memories lurk.
They loiter on the corner outside of town, next to Jorner’s General Store and that green population sign.
They linger in the trailer park where I lived for ten miserable years.
They skulk among the stiff wooden pews of First Light and the deep end of the public swimming pool and in that tall silo on my grandpa’s farm, where everything started.
You see, Katie left home with every intention of going back.
I left with every intention of staying away.
Yet here she is, telling me it’s time to face my past. Insisting it’s the only way to move forward. As if I’m not already moving forward. As if I’m not an architect for one of the most prestigious firms in Chicago. As if I don’t live in an impressive downtown loft. Or have a boyfriend who is charming and successful and takes me to places like Vail on the holidays.
She keeps looking at me like she’s unimpressed. Like I’m the one who’s missing something.
She keeps telling me it’s time to go home.
Only she doesn’t understand that Peaks isn’t my home. It stopped being my home a long time ago. Going back won’t help anyone. Not me. Not my mother. Not Robin.
I’m not the only one fighting this battle. I was talking to my friend Bailey (check out what she has to say on Dani Pettrey’s blog) the other day and we’re starting to suspect that Katie and Dani are in cahoots. Because Dani keeps pushing Bailey to go home too. The two of them insist it’s for the best.
Whose best? That’s what I want to know.
Let’s Talk: Have you ever had to do something when it was the last thing in the world you wanted to do? If so, how’d you come out on the other side?
Katie’s over at Jessica Nelson’s blog today chatting about publication.